Bring out your old (clean) jokes for an airing

This forum is for long-term games, and was initially seeded with several topics from the Chat forum.

Moderator: Steering Group

Postby Ed Swindell » Tue Feb 22, 2005 18:07

Lindsey Gray wrote:Sounds like a bit of a dodgy checkered past there, me thinks :lol:


And my mum always told me to avoid draughts too (but then she was much better at that than chess).

I think we need an emoticon for groaning 8O
Ed Swindell
 

Postby Ken Malone » Tue Feb 22, 2005 21:08

A man walks into a bar swinging a set of jumper leads above his head.

The barman looks over and says

"You're not going to start anything in here, mate!" (groan icon)
Ken Malone
 

Postby Lindsey Gray » Wed Feb 23, 2005 10:28

Talking of groaners, I think we should resurrect (is that spelt right??) the old classics of 'What do you call a man/woman with....etc' jokes.

e.g. What do you call a man with aspade in his head? - Doug! & What do you call a man without a spade in his head? - Douglas!

I know of loads of these so please feel free to add some before I bombard you all with my entire collection!!!! (YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!! :twisted: )
Lindsey Gray
 

Postby Ken Malone » Wed Feb 23, 2005 12:23

Man with a seabird on his head - CLIFF aaargh!!!!!!!!
Ken Malone
 

Postby Lindsey Gray » Wed Feb 23, 2005 14:21

Woman between two ends of a tennis court? - Annette !!!! (I'll get me coat!)

:lol:
Lindsey Gray
 

Postby Ken Malone » Wed Feb 23, 2005 15:16

a plum shaped woman - Victoria (puts on armour and flees)
Ken Malone
 

Postby Lindsey Gray » Wed Feb 23, 2005 15:44

Man in a pile of leaves? - Russell (I'm not far behind you Ken)
Lindsey Gray
 

Postby Ed Swindell » Wed Feb 23, 2005 16:39

man with a car on his head? - Jack (ducks and covers)
Ed Swindell
 

Postby Ken Malone » Wed Feb 23, 2005 17:11

Woman with a profile like a middle-eastern country!!

JORDAN :D (sorry Peter!)
Ken Malone
 

Postby Lindsey Gray » Wed Feb 23, 2005 17:22

Woman between two slices of bread....

MARGE!!! (Runs screaming)
Lindsey Gray
 

Postby Ed Swindell » Wed Feb 23, 2005 17:32

man with no arms and no legs in a swimming pool?

Bob
Ed Swindell
 

Postby Ken Malone » Wed Feb 23, 2005 17:51

man about to regurgitate a kebab at 3am??

CHUCK!!!
Ken Malone
 

Postby Ed Swindell » Wed Feb 23, 2005 18:03

What do you call a man with a raincoat?
Mac

What do you call a man with a large raincoat?
Big Mac

What do you call a man with two raincoats?
Max

What do you call a man with two raincoats in a cemetery?
Max Bygraves
Ed Swindell
 

Postby Andrew Milne » Wed Feb 23, 2005 18:43

What do you call a man with a plank of wood on his head?
Edward

What do you call a man with four planks on his head?
I've no idea but I bet Edward Woodward would!
Andrew Milne
 

Postby Ken Malone » Wed Feb 23, 2005 18:47

Andrew Milne wrote:What do you call a man with a plank of wood on his head?
Edward


I thought you'd have said "Chris" !!! (Woodhead) :D
Ken Malone
 

Postby Andrew Milne » Wed Feb 23, 2005 18:48

Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrggggggggghhhhhhhhhh! Don't mention that name!
Andrew Milne
 

Postby Ken Malone » Wed Feb 23, 2005 18:51

OFSTED

the teachers friend :D
Ken Malone
 

Postby Andrew Milne » Wed Feb 23, 2005 18:56

:rolling: absolutely! haha yeah right!
Andrew Milne
 

Postby Ken Malone » Wed Feb 23, 2005 18:58

just make sure your planning is up to date matey :D
Ken Malone
 

Postby Andrew Milne » Wed Feb 23, 2005 19:02

Oh but of course! :wink:
Andrew Milne
 

PreviousNext

Return to Fun

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 12 guests